Thursday, March 26, 2009

doctor doctor doctor; is the doc in?

All thought about in the fashion of Catch 22 or Major Major Major.

Finally I am getting to see the kidney doctor in the morning; OK here is the fancy name for kidney doctor -- nephrologist. Getting to see this elusive bird, with three appointments rescheduled by her office, is about as difficult as spotting the believed to be extinct ivory billed woodpecker, or like getting surgery for a hip or knee replacement in the land of the frozen chosen (for those not in the know this means our neighbors to north, Canada).

I should be ecstatic, however, my unbridled enthusiasm is severely tempered by the requirement to get up at 6 am and drive 30 miles one way for the appointment; then to have the joy of various bodily fluid samples required on demand.

Why is visiting with the medical profession such a stressful and often humiliating occasion?

Ah well better this than another visit to the worse than doctor person -- the dentist. The need for dentist has to be a direct result of the snake and apple escapade.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Ouch, ouch.

He casually asked if I wanted to see something educational but gross. Being somewhat shaken and a bit lightheaded, I said, sure, before I gave it much thought, and there it was in all its ugly infamy; the offending tooth.

I will not describe it further for the sake of the weak of stomach and feint of heart.

I am glad it is gone. Hopefully, the infection that destroyed jawbone, worked its way into my sinus cavity and caused great pain is gone as well.

Life is like that.

Some times we must suffer through pain (physical, spiritual, mental and emotional) to get better. Pain, believe it or not, is a good thing. It tells us when something is wrong. However, too much pain is a bad thing. So, with the help of many shots in tender places, the pain was lessened, the tooth gone and now the healing can begin.

Such is life.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Decisions, decisions

Life is always full; full of many things and right now my life is full of decisions. You would think that by the time you get to be older and wiser (hopefully, wiser) that decisions would come easier. But, for some strange reason it seems that the opposite is true.

When I was younger I made decisions quickly and without a great deal of thought to what making a decision meant, or by what standard or standards I should be making my decisions. I often worked by the heuristic that if it got me closer to my goals, whatever they were, then it was a good decision.

I have come to realize that the only true standard is, does it keep me in the center of God's will. Now of course this includes first and foremost compliance with His standards, precepts, and principles which can be known from the Bible and the indwelling guidance of the Holy Spirit.

I have also come to realize that every decision made closes as many doors as it opens. This is fuel behind the alternative history literature genre.

So, if we decide something, what might have been could have been equally as pregnant as what can be. So, how do we decide?

I can only feel it goes back to the only true standard. However, knowing God's will beyond compliance with His standards is not always an easy task, alas. It is knowing the specifics, or as they say, "the devil is in the details" that is difficult.

And it means when we worry about the future details the devil can fool us. The real true test of faith is to trust God to "be a lamp unto our feet," and "to order our steps." Note that the empahsis is directly on the next step.

So, although, we have many decisions to make about the possible shape of our future, Linda and I, just need to pass the true test of faith one day and one step at a time.